The process
“When I can’t see His hands, I can trust His heart”-unknown
For those of us who are really and truly seeking after the Lord seem to find ourselves from time to time in “the process”. It’s a time of purification and growth, of sowing and reaping, and of dying to flesh. When you find yourself in the midst of a process, it can be really hard and trying. However, upon realizing that you are actually in a “process”, it can take the pressure off. You realize that you are in the middle of God’s plan. It seems that He is only working in a small way, but in the long run you start looking back and you can’t help but stand in awe of what He’s done. I can look over my past and see the many times where I wondered if God was even there, and see how He was there and that He was setting me up for something even greater.
While I was in Cleveland, TN finishing school, I experienced God like I never have before in my life. I felt freedom, real freedom for the first time in my life. I also began to mature spiritually and learn how to function in a true community of believers. I learned how to love a city and pray for revival to come to it. The funny thing was, the revival had already begun in us. I felt like I was finally coming out of a process. I also learned how to start a process in Cleveland,. The Lord began to teach me to dig holes, meaning to sow prayer in a dry land. But, that wasn’t the end of my process.
I find myself yet again learning about the process. Fast forward three years later and I find myself at what would seem to be back at the beginning. After many attempts at finding a job in Cleveland, I moved back home. It was a very difficult move, but I trust that it was the Lord’s will. I felt like He needed me to come out from the comfort of my community of believers, so that I could learn to stand on my own as a leader. It was the whole mother bird pushes baby bird out of the nest and baby bird flies, cycle of life. Trust me; I left a piece of my heart in Cleveland. But, I know His ways are always higher than mine and I’m seeing that more and more. Through this phase of the process, I’ve definitely learned to give up my dreams and to pursue His.
For me, this process has been extremely difficult, but it’s the part that’s producing the most fruit. I believe I’m now learning to plant seeds. I’ve learned so much about ministry in the time I’ve been back. I’ve been given so many opportunities to plant seeds; from leading worship, teaching drama, teaching discipleship, and so much more. I love it!
You know when I think of process, I think of a puzzle. You see each individual piece: They are misshapen, multi-colored, and unrecognizable. But, as the pieces come together they turn into a work of art and the picture begins to make sense. So many times during the process we look at the puzzle piece and try to understand it, when the Lord is saying trust me, just wait to see the whole picture.
A danger of being in the process is simply becoming stale. It’s the concept of not blooming where you are planted. If you’re not growing you’re dying. When you are going through the process, it’s up to you to make the best of the situation. God doesn’t want us sitting around trying to think of ways to get out of the process or passing the days until it’s over. He wants us to embrace it, to bravely stand with our face towards the wind, willing to make the best of whatever is handed to us.
I’m not saying I’ve completely learned to do this, but I feel as though I am at a place where I’m learning. I know where I am is not where I want to be, but I know I have to go through the process. I’m making the best of where I am. I’m learning, growing changing, and most importantly embracing the process. It’s when we are most surrendered to Him during the process, that He is most able to use us.
I pray that you find hope and encouragement during your own process. Know that you are not alone. And most importantly know that He is worth it and He is with you.
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Here are some verses to meditate on:
More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.
Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer.
Be patient, therefore, brothers, until the coming of the Lord. See how the farmer waits for the precious fruit of the earth, being patient about it, until it receives the early and the late rains. You also, be patient. Establish your hearts, for the coming of the Lord is at hand.
Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.
